The idea for this post has been mulling around in my brain for some time now. The purpose of letting an idea mull around is that it is supposed to coalesce into a coherent thought that I can put down
on paper in writing. This idea though, it just keeps growing and feeding off of things I see and hear. So consider this to be just the tip of the iceberg. Maybe the ideas in it will start growing in your consciousness, too, which can only be a good thing.
Parents always have hopes and dreams for their children, which of course morph into new hopes and dreams as life goes on. So now that my daughters are women, what are my hopes and dreams for them?
- There’s the old stand-by, “Do I want them to have a better life than I have?” My life is pretty sweet, so that doesn’t feel right.
- Do I want them to go down the same paths that I did? No, obviously, I want them to choose the life that they want to live.
- Do I want them to be healthy and happy? Well, of course, but I want world peace, too, and sometimes life just comes at you and you have to deal with it. So I want them to be strong enough to deal with all the unhealthiness and unhappiness that will be there and to come out the other side of it as better women in some way.
As a middle-aged mother with grown daughters, I don’t want to live my life vicariously thru them, I don’t want to project what might make me happy into their life choices. But I’m a mother, dammit, and it is in all mother’s DNA to have hopes and dreams for their daughters. It is unacceptable to just give in and say, “well, parenting is over.”
I found my answer this week when Austin Kleon’s newsletter had a link to this story. Go ahead and read it.
Even though I am a woman, I still sometimes wonder how women get themselves into “situations.” I need to remind myself that we are STILL fighting for equal-pay-for-equal-work. I need to check myself when I am critical of Hillary Clinton being such a politician and remember that she is a woman and therefore must be twice as good at the political game as a man in order to succeed.
So, yeah, I hope that my daughters have a f***off fund and, quite frankly, a f***off attitude. Because dreaming is not, and has never been, good enough.